Heifer

I've taken to calling myself a heifer. I feel like a cow. I feel disgusting to be totally honest. It's bad. So I'm doing something about it.

Step #1
I called Curves for Women today and set up an appointment for tomorrow morning so I can join...again. I was a member last year before I moved (now I just need to let my boss know).

Step #2
Detox, detox, detox. And I mean seriously detox. I always feel better after a few days of raw veggies, and cooked eggs, fish and loads of water.

Step #3
Food/activities journal. I honestly don't like keeping track of EVERYTHING I put in my mouth and all the physical activities I do, but after about a week it becomes easier. Once my body adjusts to healthy choices I tend to get into a routine and I can then just keep basic records. I loath paperwork.

Step #4
Get back into the habit of doing pilates. I like yoga too, but I prefer pilates.

Don't think this is a new years resolution, because I don't ever make those. I have been working on my weight issues for years and I completely understand that it's a lifetime process for people like me (who have food addictions).

My goal pertaining to my weight is simple. I don't care so much about how long it takes or even the slight fluctuation in weight that ALWAYS happens. I just refuse to gain more from my lowest weight after any "weigh-in". So right now I am at 245lbs (according to my last "weigh-in" a few days ago) so the next time I step on the scale I must weigh the same amount or less, never more. My ultimate goal is to be healthy. Not skinny. According to the Weight Watchers weight range chart I should be anywhere from 139lbs to 174lbs. Now, that's a pretty wide range. I've set my ultimate goal weight at 170lbs. I think if I were to set my goal at 140lbs I'd go into a bad place in my mind where being thin would be more important to me than being healthy and I'd rather not do that to myself.

And the journey begins...